Øyvind Leonhardsen

Mr Simple. Many Scandinavians descended into the English Premier League in the 1990s and one of those was Øyvind ‘Leo’ Leonhardsen, the man bought to be the creative engine in the Wimbledon midfield. If I were to judge the quality of a footballer based on his name then Leonhardsen would be world-class, not to mention his looks. He should have been an elegant attacking midfielder who drifted into the wings when it suited him, but no. He was the complete opposite of that. Wikipedia tells me that in Norway the expression “a Leo run” is derived from Leonhardsen’s running capacity and smart movements. To be fair to him, he did score 19 goals in 86 caps for Norway so he wasn’t a bad player at all.

Phil Stamp

Phil Stamp hungry for the ball

Phil Stamp. Middlesbrough Midfield Maestro.  Half of the average footballers in the 1990 plied their trade at Middlesbrough and Stamp was one of them. Stamp’s name suggests he’s a no-nonsense, uncompromising central midfielder who will stamp on anything that moves anywhere near him. A central midfielder who’s deployed to stick on that pretty-boy Portuguese starlet like a postage stamp and ‘let him know he’s there’ with a crunching tackle or seven. A central midfielder who’s prepared to stamp on his grandmother in order to win. A central midfielder who was worried at the direction the Premiership was heading, firmly believing footballers will be walking out with lipstick and handbags by the year 2010. When Stamp did realise the Premiership was being invaded by soft, foreign footballers he made a good career decision to move to Scotland. Fair play to him. Phil Stamp couldn’t dream of pretending to be a footballer in the Premiership nowadays, he is perhaps the clearest indication of the improvement of the quality of the Premier League over the last decade or so.